The first time Farida Nadia Faizal Yamimi had suicidal thoughts, she was 10 years old, and she thought she would rather die than take on UPSR.

She later realised her suicidal thoughts came from her self-doubt and self-hate.

“A lot of times, as I grew up, (I thought) hey, if I die, what is the big deal?

“There would be one less mouth to feed, I would be breathing less oxygen and eating less food.

“But hey, guess what, I didn’t die,” she said at a forum discussion in Kuala Lumpur yesterday entitled ‘Mental Illness: Breaking Stigmatism’.

Farida is diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, which is characterised by a pattern of ongoing instability in moods, behaviour and relationships, amid her other symptoms.